Monday, May 4, 2015

From the mother of Jim Staley (Permission Granted)

I remember speaking with Pam Staley a number of years ago. We talked about several things. I knew at that time that she was in a difficult time with her son. I read the following, teared up a bit and reread it again. I am reminded of the years that I wasted addicted to drugs with four young children. I remember facing ten years in prison. Most of all, I remember coming home from having brain surgery whereby I was expected to be a vegetable. My mother had flown out from Rochester, NY. Mom and I had a very tumultuous relationship. I was separated from my family, mom was staying at my apartment. Mom had cleaned everything. The place did not look like a drug addict lived there. I walked into the apartment with a bandage wrapped around my entire head. I saw my mother and years, years of animosity mixed with love and hate drained from my soul, from my spirit. It was in that moment that I understood the love that my mother has always had for her children.........
I asked Pam Staley if I could post this on my blog. She said, yes.
I should also mention that I spoke with Jim Staley several months ago...I knew then the trouble he was in. I stopped fighting with our Biblical family about the same time.

I encourage you to put down your stones and raise your hands in prayer

Thank you, Jeff Morton


From Pam Staley


Jim and Pam Staley
As the social waters swirl menacingly around our family, it causes this daughter, this sister, mother, wife, this grandmother to catch her breath, to fight back the anguish and to pound the palms of her hands into her eyes because the torrential pain keeps leaking out. There is no way to go around this, ignore or deny the consequences of what is going on in our family. Social media has been like a raging wildfire and the frenzy over what has happened in our family seems to be burning completely out of control. My heart breaks as I see close friends adding fuel to the fire and seemingly enjoy the problems of a young man, a young leader, who has opened the hearts of so many around the world to the full word of the bible. One who has, if you are reading this page, has spoken truth into your heart at one time or another. One who is not perfect - has made his share of mistakes ... but is still a son of the King.

How did we get here? Where do we go? What on earth is going on? Who are we as a people?? As a people called by the Most High God? Is this how we are supposed to act? Is this what love looks like? And, yes, who am I to even ask those questions?

This, in my humble opinion, is still all a 'test' a major test. You may believe that what has happened to our son is simply just rewards, that it is long overdue - that your pain and your offenses that have gripped your hearts and that you hold against Jim Staley and PFT are justified - so you lash out with comments and remarks for the world to grab on to and then burn and inflame others hearts as well.

How have I come to this understanding? How would I know what you are feeling? Because I was there as well. Yes....I was there. Four years ago I walked away from my son and PFT....I was offended and felt I had a right as his mother to expose what I thought was the wrong direction ...I was so sure that I was 'right' that I did not consider anything else. And I broke the commands of my Creator and slandered and gossiped against my own son. I left him exposed and hurting and only thought of my own feelings. The pain and frustration and confusion led me to go against my mother's heart and the heart of the One I say I serve ...I felt 'justified'. Four long years my friends... four long years. Wasted years - years never to be regained...lost forever. Years filled with heartache and tears and telling 'God' what He should do!

Recently, we have all been humbled, I have realized that lashing out and exposing anyone - ANYONE - is never the way to act - never justified - it is simply what it truly is - gossip and slander. Nothing more - nothing less. It destroys relationships and it breaks our Father's heart. Our family has been thru trial after trial, fire after fire, but we have grown and matured and are able to recognize that our heavenly Father gave us a set of guidelines to follow ... and when we don't - we break His heart and cause circumstances to spiral out of control. Being in this walk for almost 30 years, one would think I would have had the wisdom on how to handle various situations, but I did not have the understanding to use that wisdom - I used the world's wisdom.

So for those of you reading the papers, and following along on social media, and for those that I led astray with my own hurt, please hear me - instead of joining the fray, and lashing out - S T O P. This is YOUR TEST as well. Please take to heart, all of you, that this is not what we are supposed to be leading with - we are NOT to have knee-jerk reactions - we are not to find pleasure in the troubles of ANYONE - we are to lend a hand to the one who has fallen in the ditch - we are to lift them up - not pass them by - smiling as we walk past them thanking our Creator that it is not us in the ditch! What will you say when you stand before your KING - will you say ... 'I stopped by the side of the road to help a brother' or will you instead say that 'I picked up a stone to throw'. As for the leaders in ministry who have remained silent...NOW is the time to speak up - to admonish those that throw stones and to cover each other in prayer instead - BE a LEADER - LEAD the flock, and let your voices be heard!!! It is time to recognize that we are a BODY of believers and that maturity must come soon - or it will be too late. Time is short. No one is able to judge the heart of the matter - only our Father.

This is a testing time - each and every one of us are being tested to see what is in our hearts. Each and everyone one of us have been offended and wronged in some way by someone, and feel justified in our defensive actions. I'm here to tell you - GET OVER IT!!!! You are either DEAD in Messiah or you LIVE for yourself. Ask yourself - is what I'm doing PLEASING to my God? I stand before you this day, as his mother, and say I was guilty of the same thing...and it is a daily, sometimes, moment by moment struggle not to sink back into that pit of offenses that I built! But the time has come to rid ourselves OF ourselves and only be lifted up in HIM. My heart is to be pleasing to my God - to heal the broken hearted and to bring SHALOM - PEACE - not to cause more confusion and chaos!!! Please join hands with me - a broken vessel - so that all of us can be healed by the great physician!!!

If you have read this far, I beg you to examine yourself, your heart, your attitude - as I have had to do - admitting guilt and repenting, and ask yourself this question........... am I building up the Kingdom with my actions and speech..... or not?

May each of you have the peace that is beyond understanding from the One true Father of us all ... and may we walk in peace with each other, as we bind each others wounds. Thank you for listening....


The Jeff Morton Report Sundays at 4:00 Pacific Time http://wawradio.net (Internet Radio) Visit jeffsmorton.com for additional information

2 comments:

Adele van Niekerk said...

As a mother I want to thank you this morning for showing me the true colours of my heart. I need only use one word to acknowledge an agree whole heartedly with your message, Amen.
And as your son said " do not be angry at Egypt, if it was not for Egypt, we would not be here"
I can only imagine how deep your hurt and anguish goes for the "crucifixion "of your beloved son.
Take heart dearest. If it wasn't for the cross, there could be no new beginnings.

Adéle van Niekerk
Paarl
South Africa
adelevanniekerk7777@gmail.com

salli erkkila said...

THANK YOU PAM FOR SHARING, YOU ARE SUCH A BLESSING AND A TRUE EXAMPLE OF WALKING IN TRUTH, owning our stuff, taking responsability and moving forward, God is at work in all of our lives, our pride and judgemental hearts are such barriers in our walk and closeness to the Fathers heart.

Shalom Salli